I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
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Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
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Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
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