Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
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either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
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So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
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