I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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