I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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