So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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