I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
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U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
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I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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