Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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