K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize