I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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