I just saw a hot homeless man
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
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This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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