Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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