I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize