Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
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I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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