I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
