I'd wear matching sweaters with you
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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