dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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