I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize