That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
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It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
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She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize