If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I just found a bag of teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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