You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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