it hurts more in the daytime
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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