Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize