butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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