Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
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