my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
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