No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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