I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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