office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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