Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
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