Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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