just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize