Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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