i love accidental penises.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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