whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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