I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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