um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize