I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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