Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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