I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize