Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
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And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
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