good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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