I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize