are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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