don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize