just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize