you're like a bully in the Christmas story
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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