It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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