One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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