She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
jump out the window naked night went bad
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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