singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
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She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
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Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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